SPADGE

Just curious to see how many of you beyond say 35 are single due to divorce etc...?
May be joining you very soon (seriously) if she doesn't stfu

RS500/364

Old in age erm
Single
FREE OMG YER IF SHE IS FIT and the last 1 was

focusbird

Old? I'm 34

Single due to divorce? Yes

Free? Nope

roybacer

My mum and dad are both in there late 40's and divorced

SPADGE

Sorry to be nosey but how old were you when they split?

Westy

iTrader: (1)

Spadge ... NO .. hope its alright mate

as you kow, Im young, so cant comment

CossieRich

iTrader: (1)

My mum and dad are both 50 this year and are divroced. i was 21 when it all happened 4 years ago.

Spadge. women never stfu. you should know that the 3rd time round

DaveEscos

so basically, you've never had a girlfriend! FPMSL


little runty cunt!

SPADGE

Yep 3 marriages and people wonder why i'm bitter and broke
This one is the longest at 7/8 (fooked if i know exactly) years and i swear if it wasn't for my son (whom i love dearly ) she would either be propping up the patio or i would be long gone

Westy

iTrader: (1)

not the time or plce you dirty cunt...

sure this is a serious post

CharlieSaff

Sorry to hear this Spadge

SPADGE

Guys don't get all mournfull on me please if it happens it happens life goes on and all that Only thing that really concerns me is my son

dave cos4x4

iTrader: (5)

Sorry to here this Jules.

Hope you can sort it out for the sake of your little lad.

roybacer

errrmmm, i was about 19 when they finally got divorced

but moved out of home when i was 17 due to them

So tbh i dont think it effected me in anyway really, other then some debt from renting when i was on shite money

tbh i cant think of that many of my good mates whose parents are actually still together

Doug

Gotta agree with Spadge it doe's get messy mate and is well fucked up when there are kids involved I split from my ex ex mrs 6 years ago my girls are 9 and 11 and she is still a bitch now
Fucking heart breaking mate
Iv'e just got over a ban from seeing the girls and now its fucked up again

Stupid bint



Regards Doug .

richm

yes and yes for me...

Staffi

iTrader: (1)

Spadge, dont take this the wrong way fella, but if your not happy, and both not getting on, that type of envirement want be good for the little one.

Iknow its shit having to split, but kids pick up on atmospheres and rows...

SPADGE

I know mate and he is such a dear little lad
Problem is i truly believe i would be a better 'full time' parent for him if he could only have one of us I look after him for over half the time on my own anyway and he always seems happier with me. I put him to bed every night and the thought of not being able to see him when i like and just do the things we do now is upsetting.
Problem in this day and age as always is that i no doubt will have very few rights as regards my son regardless of who is better suited as a parent due purely to the fact that i am male
Its about time in this age of equality that the laws regarding parental rights were brought up to date and men wern't discriminated against just for being men
Thanks for the rest of your replys i have read them all!

Staffi

iTrader: (1)

Agree 100% mate, laws are a joke

Kids lively hoods we are talking about here, its time something was done

People slate those dads that climb Buckingham Palace to protest, but thats the only way they are heard...........for fuck sake, they only want to see the children...........

Lee Reynolds

Fooking hell Spadge you came accross as(over the net of course) to be a happy couple

Hope it works out...especially for Elliot.

frog

Spadge, totally agree with staffi and I can see your side of the coin too.

I've a friend who had to go through hell and high water to have access to his kids because of a psycho wife
Sometimes it works reasonably well, sometimes, it doesn't - tough choice to make.

Might be worth seeking experience from folks who are from divorced parents, or parents who stayed together despite their lack of "interest" in each other to see how they lived it, and maybe help you make a decision for the better of the lil' one.

MrsFrog lived through a similar thing (as a kid) for 12 years until her parents eventually divorced. She says that whatever and however her parents tried to hide, the fact they weren't getting on wasn't lost on her as a kid.

DaveEscos

sorry to hear this spadge..

cant you break her and put her on ebay?


every couple has its rough patches pal

RSCossieGaz

iTrader: (6)

hope you sort things mate

flyingfocrs

37 next month
Seperated 6 months ago from my Wife who I was with for 18 years.
Single ish

I stayed with her about XX years longer than I should have because of the kids.
My 21 yr old Step-daughter and 17 yr old son both chose to stay with me as they can't get on with her either.
I know it's different for you as your lad is still young.
But as has been said they both knew there was a tension between us at times.
Might be worth sitting down and telling her how you feel first and try to sort it after all at worst you would just seperate anyway, at best you could sort it out.
Good luck either way.
Mike

phil clay

i would say try and work things out,and it takes a lot of dedication from both of you, if all fails i dont think it is good for the child to be in a bad atmosphere,if you are arguing a lot ,dont do it in front of your son,it is hard not to but bite hard on your lip!

i split up from my girlfriend after 9 years,she run off with another man,and although i hate her i never slag her off in front of my kids,i have them every weekend and always try and ask how mummy is,and try and seem interested in her,it makes things better for them!

think of your son and yourself,and be the best daddy you can be for him,but you must make sure you look after yourself,trust me ive been on my own since begining of december and i am so content now,and my kids are very happy,and love it when they come over to stay at weekends

hope thats some help mate! regards phil

xr_craig

iTrader: (2)

Hope you sort it out mate, only 20 so never had to go through this from either point of view.

However, i did see how it affected my uncle a couple of years ago and even now. It's not good mate and it's very hard on his kids - 6 year old boys.

cossie350

Hi Spadge i have read some of your other posts and thought you was abit of a coont firstly would like to apologize for that as after reading this you seem v.sound. Secondly im not sure how old your lad is but when i was 10 my parents separated (lived with my mum)and ever since (now 24)my relationship with my dad has grown stronger. He is now like a best mate and i see him at least twice a week also he has just helped me build my 3dr. So i wouldnt worry to much about what is going to happen as im sure whatever happens you and you lad will be fine.

SPADGE

Note to self don't start a thread and then not read it for a while

Not going to reply to individuals as i'll be here all night but thanks very much for all your advice and support It is a sticky time and to be honest has been getting progresivly worse since our son was born very prematurely 2.5 years ago. He is a great little lad and seems so far to have got this far unscathed by the obvious atmosphere between myself and the wife but i am sure i see a bit of worry on his face sometimes
The situation isn't helped and if anything been made worse since the wife decided to start doing a different shift pattern at work which involves working stupid times from 3pm until 2am Its on a 4 day on 4 day off rotation but she needs a min of 8 hours sleep every night and turns into a real fookin freak if this is cut short! I tried to get her to not start it in the 1st place but her being a stubborn fooker just went ahead and did it any way.
Getting time without our son around to have any sort of chat let alone a lengthy discusion isn't easy due to the above but i'm going to make damned sure it happens in the next day or two and get this sorted one way or another.
Thanks again for your input and all the support
Regards Spadge...

PS. cossie350 i can be a coont at times and boredom often plays its part in that! but please don't judge a book soley by its internet cover

T28 RST

Spadge is this you in the back ground of this pic, i was told it was you but dont know

RichardC

get someone to babysit your lad and take your missis out somewhere where you can have a sit down and a good chat


just being able to relax together will be a help in itself

goodluck with whatever you decide to do

SPADGE

Afraid so mate! Handsome devil arn't i
That is Ian3door's wife Deb next to me together with his 3 door and my moonstone saff in the back ground

T28 RST

Couldnt resist taking the pic of Elvis

SPADGE

Havn't been out on our own for over 2 years I guess that isn't too healthy either

I'll give it a go mate and cheers for your advice and support!

SPADGE

Elvis and co got lost in Cumbria and asked if they could follow me to the show 200 yards from the entrance They were already on the lash and it was only about 9am

T28 RST

Sounds like them

Anonymous

Im old & Free Spadge but still happily married .

mick

iTrader: (1)

34, seperated nearly 2 years with custody of 2 out of 3 kids so not exactly "free"

DaveEscos

SPadge, is that a ford RS t shirt you're wearing?


YOU FOOKING GINGER GAY LORD!

Stu @ M Developments

iTrader: (12)

Genuinely sorry to read this Spadge...

Ive been here and done this myself, and know a lot about how much "Right" you have, and its virtually nil mate, virtually nil. However, the fact your married gives you far more right than i had as an unmarried father, even though we had lived together and fathered 2 children over almost 12years.

I fought my ex for custody of mine and only got to see them after 2years of aggro and grief, and still today we argue over bugger all and there is always a horrible air about teh place when we are together, its grim for all concerned.

I do have access now and have the girls every other weekend and over teh school holidays etc, so all is well again, but largely only because they grew up and started making demans the mother couldnt meet, both mentally and financially. I almost won by default and not by right...

I think you need to find someone to watch Elliot whilst you go out for a night, or ideally a weekend. Make her aware of how low your feeling and hope she puts as much value on a good frank discussion as you are obviously prepared to. If she doesnt, you have problems as we both know a stubborn woman wont stay in teh room long enough to hear your screams, let alone hold a discussion.

All the best for teh coming weeks fella...

Gra

old erm no, single no been with karen since 18 (34 now) and still happy