any jokes post em ere
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any jokes post em ere
a giggles good for ya lets here ya jokes 
a man is told he has 24hrs to live, he tells his wife and asks if they can make love one last time, crying she agrees and they av mind blowing sex, after 12hrs he asks again and she gives him the best blowjob hes ever had. 4hrs to go and he begs for one last go,
"FUCK OFF" she daid , IM NOT BEING FUNNY BUT I HAVE TO GET UP IN THE MORNING, YOU DONT!
a man is told he has 24hrs to live, he tells his wife and asks if they can make love one last time, crying she agrees and they av mind blowing sex, after 12hrs he asks again and she gives him the best blowjob hes ever had. 4hrs to go and he begs for one last go,
"FUCK OFF" she daid , IM NOT BEING FUNNY BUT I HAVE TO GET UP IN THE MORNING, YOU DONT!
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one more befor i fuck off to the pub 
a nun gets on a bus thats empty except the driver she says im going to die soon but i want to have sex befor i do but i must remain a virgin so it must be anal and i cannot commit adultery so it must be a single man, can you fullfil my wish? yes he says and nails it full bore balls slapping
then feeling guilty he says im sorry i lied i,m married with 3 kids, thats ok said the nun i lied too, my name is kevin and im going to a fancey dress party
a nun gets on a bus thats empty except the driver she says im going to die soon but i want to have sex befor i do but i must remain a virgin so it must be anal and i cannot commit adultery so it must be a single man, can you fullfil my wish? yes he says and nails it full bore balls slapping
then feeling guilty he says im sorry i lied i,m married with 3 kids, thats ok said the nun i lied too, my name is kevin and im going to a fancey dress party
Blonde takes her car to the garage for repair, mechanic fixes it in 2 mins and says "just shit in the air filter", Blonde says "really! How often do i have to do that then?"
Too many posts.. I need a life!!
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 567
Likes: 2
From: Lost!!
A blind man entered a lesbian bar by mistake.
He made his way to a barstool and ordered a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yelled to the bartender in a loud voice,
"Hey bartender, you wanna hear a dumb blonde joke?"
The bar immediately fell deathly quiet.
In a deep, husky voice, the woman next to him said,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things..
One: The bartender is a blonde woman.
Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman.
Three: The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional boxer.
Four: The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Five: I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a Ph. D., a black belt in karate, and a very bad attitude.
Now, think about it seriously, mister.
Do you still want to tell that joke?"
The blind man thought for a second, shook his head and said,
"Nah. Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
He made his way to a barstool and ordered a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yelled to the bartender in a loud voice,
"Hey bartender, you wanna hear a dumb blonde joke?"
The bar immediately fell deathly quiet.
In a deep, husky voice, the woman next to him said,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things..
One: The bartender is a blonde woman.
Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman.
Three: The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional boxer.
Four: The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Five: I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a Ph. D., a black belt in karate, and a very bad attitude.
Now, think about it seriously, mister.
Do you still want to tell that joke?"
The blind man thought for a second, shook his head and said,
"Nah. Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Ban[B][/B]ned
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 34,090
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From: The Pool.
A man goes to his doctor for an annual check up.
The doctor says "I'll need you to come back tomorrow with a urine sample, a poo sample and a sperm sample".
The man replies "Right so doctor, I'll bring'em by tomorrow"
When he gets home his wife askes "Well what did he say ?"
The man replies "He needs me to bring in a pair of your underwear."
The doctor says "I'll need you to come back tomorrow with a urine sample, a poo sample and a sperm sample".
The man replies "Right so doctor, I'll bring'em by tomorrow"
When he gets home his wife askes "Well what did he say ?"
The man replies "He needs me to bring in a pair of your underwear."
PassionFord Regular
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 442
Likes: 1
From: East Staffordshire
An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.
He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'
'Just water,' says the priest.
The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'
The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'
He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'
'Just water,' says the priest.
The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'
The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'
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Posts: 34,090
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From: The Pool.
Originally Posted by Rudey
Originally Posted by Benni
Black person wanted, must be flexible and willing to travel.... Mudflap.
Benni.
Benni.
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Originally Posted by Dre.1983
An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.
He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'
'Just water,' says the priest.
The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'
The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'
He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'
'Just water,' says the priest.
The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'
The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'
Advanced PassionFord User
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2,053
Likes: 8
From: Glasgow/Oban
Originally Posted by Rudey
oh your one of them clever bastads aint ya so you saying just coz its a car forum you cant have a laugh? well fuck you mate you dont know fuck all about the comunity then do ya 
that self explanitary enough for ya is it?
that self explanitary enough for ya is it?hes implying PF is a joke