gutted
13-10-2009, 04:59 PM
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COS i'm WORTH it
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gutted
sorry to put something really personal on here, not something i usually do, but i need to get it out there before i burst
just come back from the hospital, me and the wife have been trying for kids since before we got married, been married just over 2 years now, anyways, been for tests for this tests for that, the wife had to have an op for removing something thought to be getting in the way...
and it turns out, that, everything is fine and dandy with the wife after her op, me however, i am producing, but none of them are alive or motile, so, officially, i cannot have kids, absolutley gutted
just come back from the hospital, me and the wife have been trying for kids since before we got married, been married just over 2 years now, anyways, been for tests for this tests for that, the wife had to have an op for removing something thought to be getting in the way...
and it turns out, that, everything is fine and dandy with the wife after her op, me however, i am producing, but none of them are alive or motile, so, officially, i cannot have kids, absolutley gutted
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13-10-2009, 07:17 PM
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COS i'm WORTH it
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cheeRS guys, not been the best day i have ever had...... been talking to god on the great white telephone since friday too, don't know if its nerves cos of today coming or just a bug, but hey ho.
we do still have options, lots of complecated lab based stuff with extraction from us both, but thats if they can find motile examples from myself, then there is adoption, donor or fostering. But all the same, not y own flesh and blood if you know what i mean.......
we're off to cuba in 2 weeks so just gonna try and chill out and look at all our options when we get back
its breaking my heart cos the wife is desperate for little ones, and its shit knowing i can't give her that
we do still have options, lots of complecated lab based stuff with extraction from us both, but thats if they can find motile examples from myself, then there is adoption, donor or fostering. But all the same, not y own flesh and blood if you know what i mean.......
we're off to cuba in 2 weeks so just gonna try and chill out and look at all our options when we get back
its breaking my heart cos the wife is desperate for little ones, and its shit knowing i can't give her that
13-10-2009, 07:30 PM
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adoption is excellent, id love to do it as theres millions of kids out there who really need a mum and dad . Everyone treats it as a last resort which is wrong really
Good luck hope all goes well mate
Good luck hope all goes well mate
13-10-2009, 07:33 PM
#16
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BigJim19 - its breaking my heart cos the wife is desperate for little ones, and its shit knowing i can't give her that
just hearing that bit is bad enough, really do feel sorry for you, hope things manage to turn around for you
just hearing that bit is bad enough, really do feel sorry for you, hope things manage to turn around for you
15-10-2009, 12:13 PM
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I know what your going through mate as I've been there myself. 
Same scenario, the wife was being tested as we just assumed that as I made a mess I must be ok
and as she had had problems with endemetriosis (sp) before so assumed she would be at fault. They done a routine test on me and when I went back for the results the doctor just said "there was nothing in there" so I had to do another sample. Me being ignorant thought "WTF, are they drinking it or something as I definitely placed something in there" 
Transpires that he meant no swimmers but he didn't actually say that!
I was told, as I'm sure you have been, that if there are zero swimmers then its irreversible and highly unlikely that you will be able to father a child. There was talk of cutting into a bollock to see if there were any live ones in there that could be used. Fostering was mentioned as was using a donor. At the time I couldn't get my head around the child not being mine and point blank didn't want to know. The wife agreed that we wanted children together and that it was both of ours or not at all. the doctor even had the cheek to say that there were quite a few people that had used donors in our area and that the children even grow up to look like that father!! I mean WTF that's not even possible!
Fortunately for me I had caused the demise of swimmers by taking performance enhancing drugs.
Something the doctors said was not possible and also a side not normally associated with it! After about 18 months of not using (and depression etc) my body eventually kicked back into action and my wife fell naturally. I'm still not sure hes mine as it was a difficult journey.
I think what I am trying to say in a very long winded way is two things. Firstly don't give up just yet, there could be a reversible reason behind this.
and secondly, something to consider. I never wanted to have someone elses baby as I saw it. However, now I have a son who is 18 months old and a complete joy I wouldn't change it for the world. Knowing what I do now, if I was given the opportunity to have him even though it wasn't my sperm I would without hesitation. If you can get your head around it the joys of being a parent are not about one tiny tiny bit of cum that you can't see with the naked eye! If you can't do that in your situation, which I fully understand from bring there, then look at adoption! Take a child that wants a loving family, that doesn't have one, and give them just that. Parenting is not about the conception!
Good luck with it all anyway, I know exactly where your coming from.
Same scenario, the wife was being tested as we just assumed that as I made a mess I must be ok
and as she had had problems with endemetriosis (sp) before so assumed she would be at fault. They done a routine test on me and when I went back for the results the doctor just said "there was nothing in there" so I had to do another sample. Me being ignorant thought "WTF, are they drinking it or something as I definitely placed something in there" Transpires that he meant no swimmers but he didn't actually say that!I was told, as I'm sure you have been, that if there are zero swimmers then its irreversible and highly unlikely that you will be able to father a child. There was talk of cutting into a bollock to see if there were any live ones in there that could be used. Fostering was mentioned as was using a donor. At the time I couldn't get my head around the child not being mine and point blank didn't want to know. The wife agreed that we wanted children together and that it was both of ours or not at all. the doctor even had the cheek to say that there were quite a few people that had used donors in our area and that the children even grow up to look like that father!! I mean WTF that's not even possible!
Fortunately for me I had caused the demise of swimmers by taking performance enhancing drugs.
Something the doctors said was not possible and also a side not normally associated with it! After about 18 months of not using (and depression etc) my body eventually kicked back into action and my wife fell naturally. I'm still not sure hes mine as it was a difficult journey.I think what I am trying to say in a very long winded way is two things. Firstly don't give up just yet, there could be a reversible reason behind this.
and secondly, something to consider. I never wanted to have someone elses baby as I saw it. However, now I have a son who is 18 months old and a complete joy I wouldn't change it for the world. Knowing what I do now, if I was given the opportunity to have him even though it wasn't my sperm I would without hesitation. If you can get your head around it the joys of being a parent are not about one tiny tiny bit of cum that you can't see with the naked eye! If you can't do that in your situation, which I fully understand from bring there, then look at adoption! Take a child that wants a loving family, that doesn't have one, and give them just that. Parenting is not about the conception!
Good luck with it all anyway, I know exactly where your coming from.
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