shaking like a shitting dog

if the main road is red, take the dirt track instead

perfect planning plus preperation prevents piss poor performance

hung like a donkey

 

shes so hairy, she makes bigfoot look naked

 

that cunts got short arms and long pockets

 

shes got a pussy like a badly packed kebab

 

got a right rusty bulet hole

gotta go release the chocolate hostage


thats me all done

 

You have a set of teeth like a row of burnt out house,s

 

A face only a mother could love, and she put you up for adoption.

 

"got teeth like a burnt fence"

"he/she has summer teeth.........summer yellow, summer green, summer black"

 

FUCK THAT FOR A GAME OF SOILDERS

FUCK ME SIDEWAYS

 

Whenever looking at a car to buy I like to say 'It's had more hits than the beatles'.

 

is your mum a weightlifter? she fucking has to be to bring up a dumbbell like you

 

The Midwife slapped your mum across the face, I think my dad uses that one on me at least twice a day.

 

Shes been banged more times than a taxi door

Got a face like a stunt mans knee

Like throwing a carrot down a windsock

shes got straight hair and curley teeth

got a nose like fcuk nose

Is that you ring a can feel- No its my watch

You were that ugly you had a curtian around you pram and your mum fead you with a catapult

Teeth on you that could eat an apple through a tennis racket

 

shes got a body like baywatch & face like crimewatch

i bet she could suck a golfball thru a garden hose

the best part of you rolled down your mothers leg

so ugly your mother tried to push you back in