Dilemma-what would you do?
12-10-2004, 06:08 PM
#1
garibaldi
Thread Starter
Dilemma-what would you do?
Long story, but what would you do?
My sister has been seeing her chap for 4.5 years now. Hes an ex Ford technician and has many many contacts in the Auto industry, but put that aside for one minute. He has been good in the past to me like helping me reshell me car, get me parts etc etc etc.
My sister has always had her suspicions about him cheating. She has now found out that he has got about 5 girls on the go, and 4 different kids by these women. One has has been seeing 13 years, one for 9 years and my sister for 4.5 years and he has managed to juggle these around and get away with it.
My sister hates him, me mum hates him and as you could imagine the reste of me family are pretty pissed about it all.
In light of this, do you think I should not remain friens with him or not. My sister says its up to me, but I can tell she aint happy. On the other side of the coin, I broke down yesterday and he came to rescue me and helped me put me car right. (starter motor and battery).
In your honest opinon what shud i do?
My sister has been seeing her chap for 4.5 years now. Hes an ex Ford technician and has many many contacts in the Auto industry, but put that aside for one minute. He has been good in the past to me like helping me reshell me car, get me parts etc etc etc.
My sister has always had her suspicions about him cheating. She has now found out that he has got about 5 girls on the go, and 4 different kids by these women. One has has been seeing 13 years, one for 9 years and my sister for 4.5 years and he has managed to juggle these around and get away with it.
My sister hates him, me mum hates him and as you could imagine the reste of me family are pretty pissed about it all.
In light of this, do you think I should not remain friens with him or not. My sister says its up to me, but I can tell she aint happy. On the other side of the coin, I broke down yesterday and he came to rescue me and helped me put me car right. (starter motor and battery).
In your honest opinon what shud i do?
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12-10-2004, 06:19 PM
#12
garibaldi
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I kno, difficult aint it. i mean he found me a mint turbo unit Ł80, frst rebuilt bottom end Ł200, new batts for Ł25 etc etc, plus he helps does things like fit me new tappets. He's really good to me kids..............
12-10-2004, 06:43 PM
#13
formerly uyo1972
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hes got no morrals though , the bigger they are, the harder they fall,
havent you seen rocky 4 ..
i aint a big bloke, but id still fuck him up if it was one of my 3 sisters , and if my little girl ever came across a boyfriend like that. id chop his balls off,
sorry,
i was cheated on mate, and it aint nice, think of all them poor kids ,
havent you seen rocky 4 ..
i aint a big bloke, but id still fuck him up if it was one of my 3 sisters , and if my little girl ever came across a boyfriend like that. id chop his balls off,
sorry,
i was cheated on mate, and it aint nice, think of all them poor kids ,
12-10-2004, 06:49 PM
#15
formerly uyo1972
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Originally Posted by the sludge
Matt/deerhunter, I would but he is a head doorman and weighs 18st
im not trying to start an argument with you sludge, but i used to be 17 stone, and head of my job, ok i work for myself, lol,
but it didnt give me the right to cheat on my girlfreind and daughter,
maybee he has been doing you favours because he knows hes a tw@t.
ive never posted stuff like this before, im usualy chilled. but a cheat is a cheat mate , and family is family
12-10-2004, 06:52 PM
#17
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Matt/deerhunter, I would but he is a head doorman and weighs 18st
12-10-2004, 06:56 PM
#18
garibaldi
Thread Starter
yeh maybe you are right guys. He has been part of my life as well and my kids love him and always ask when is Uncle clive coming to see us. He's great with em.
LOL@RSt lee.
Deerhunter , nah mate it wudnt start an argument at all dude. Just very interested in what others would do
LOL@RSt lee.
Deerhunter , nah mate it wudnt start an argument at all dude. Just very interested in what others would do
12-10-2004, 07:01 PM
#19
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cool mate, i usualy type posts, my views, and dont post them, as i know how easy people take words the wrong way,and i dont want to be labeled a trouble maker , but i had to give my view , on this topic ,
12-10-2004, 07:04 PM
#20
garibaldi
Thread Starter
its coool dude, really really appreciate ya thoughts mate. No offence taken or wil lbe taken by anyone who posts to this. Just my head is spinning around what to do like.
Aint your car in a mag this month?
Aint your car in a mag this month?
12-10-2004, 07:12 PM
#22
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Joking aside. Your sister must be hurting bad however hard she trys to put a brave face on it. Maybe you should just give the situation some time. Tell him he is an arse but just let the dust settle, if the friendship is worth keeping then dont throw it away. but like above blodd thciker than water.
12-10-2004, 07:43 PM
#25
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Similer situation happened to me i was told to keep out of it as i would have got myself into trouble by decking the sisters other half 
But i so would ave liked too
But i so would ave liked too
13-10-2004, 07:52 AM
#26
garibaldi
Thread Starter
Originally Posted by ballin
jesus mate, fuck the odd few quid he saves you here and there, hes fucked about with your sister causing her a lot of pain and grief, cant believe you are even asking this on a public forum 
13-10-2004, 07:57 AM
#27
Family DEFINATELY comes first. Even if your sis has said that its OK for you and him to stay friends, so doesn't really mean it. If you stay friends with him, you will severely damage things between you and her.
It so sounds like you wanted everyone to say 'Yeah, stay mates with him' so that you could get your cheap bits, but there is only one way to go.......
It so sounds like you wanted everyone to say 'Yeah, stay mates with him' so that you could get your cheap bits, but there is only one way to go.......
13-10-2004, 07:57 AM
#28
Legend
Depends how much you like your sister mate.
Both mine are complete arses so I'd probably shake the bloke by his hand.
Punch him anyway just to see if he's hard or not. If he just flinches then it'd be best to run.
Both mine are complete arses so I'd probably shake the bloke by his hand.
Punch him anyway just to see if he's hard or not. If he just flinches then it'd be best to run.
13-10-2004, 08:41 AM
#31
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have you spoken to him about what he's done to your sister? He may have been helpful all those years because he knew it would come out one day and he wanted you on his side?
13-10-2004, 09:42 AM
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Someone has just done that to my sister, I'm biding my time, if he doesn't go to prison for dealing next month he'll certainly get his comeuppance
13-10-2004, 10:20 AM
#33
Testing the future
sounds to me like you've got no lasting hard feelings towards him for what he's done, so why shouldn't you remain friends?
what has happened with your sister is really none of your business. unless she has asked you to stop being mates, then you might consider it.
anyone trying to be hard with all this talk of hurting him to "protect" their sister is not considering her at all.
family will always be there, but it's hard enough to have good mates and keep them through life without things like this getting in the way. over time, the family will lose their animosity towards him. it won't take long for the next boyfriend to come along and it'll all be forgotten.
try and keep him as a mate is my advice.
what has happened with your sister is really none of your business. unless she has asked you to stop being mates, then you might consider it.
anyone trying to be hard with all this talk of hurting him to "protect" their sister is not considering her at all.
family will always be there, but it's hard enough to have good mates and keep them through life without things like this getting in the way. over time, the family will lose their animosity towards him. it won't take long for the next boyfriend to come along and it'll all be forgotten.
try and keep him as a mate is my advice.
13-10-2004, 10:26 AM
#34
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i think some of the reply's here are very one sided yeah he's a lier and a cheat but , wouldnt most of us like to have a little extra on the side ?? and just because he wasnt with just one woman it duznt mean he loved her any less or only did it to look big 
yes i agree your sister is hurting now but she isnt gna die from it m8 and he obviously wasnt beating her which would be much worse ..
@ the end of the day m8 i dont see why it should effect your friendship with him as long as he knows you arent happy about the situation .
yeah he's a lier and a cheat but , wouldnt most of us like to have a little extra on the side ?? and just because he wasnt with just one woman it duznt mean he loved her any less or only did it to look big yes i agree your sister is hurting now but she isnt gna die from it m8 and he obviously wasnt beating her which would be much worse .. @ the end of the day m8 i dont see why it should effect your friendship with him as long as he knows you arent happy about the situation .
13-10-2004, 10:36 AM
#35
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its a real tough one!
yeah he's fcuked your sister about and i do agree that blood is thicker than water, but at the end of the day you have built up a friendship with this guy and he has helped you out at times when youve needed it!
If i were you id make it very clear that you do not agree with what hes done. If your sister doesnt mind you staying in touch with him, then i dont see why you shouldnt if you want to. He hasnt done anything personally wrong to YOU!
but im sure he knows that you aint best pleased with the way hes treated your sister.
yeah he's fcuked your sister about and i do agree that blood is thicker than water, but at the end of the day you have built up a friendship with this guy and he has helped you out at times when youve needed it!
If i were you id make it very clear that you do not agree with what hes done. If your sister doesnt mind you staying in touch with him, then i dont see why you shouldnt if you want to. He hasnt done anything personally wrong to YOU!
but im sure he knows that you aint best pleased with the way hes treated your sister.
13-10-2004, 10:38 AM
#36
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going by my sister they are that stupid that if you was to tell him to fook off or deck him etc..etc you probably find she will be back with him next week then your left looking the c**t just my opinon 
13-10-2004, 10:52 AM
#39
Seems like you have already laid the foundations for remaining friends, as you accepted help from him yesterday 
. It would seem a bit harsh after doing that to then turn on him (but could be a good way of saying "fuck you" if that is how you feel ). Ideally, you should have severed all ties straight away or stick with a decision to remain friends with him.
A difficult one and maybe worth talking over with your sister to find out how she would really feal about you remaining friends with him (taking time to explain how much your kids think of him as well). She may understand and accept that he has done nothing to directly hurt you, if so and it is a friendship you feel is worth something then keep it. If not and your family's approval is something that is more important to you, then all you have to do is to explain to him why you will have to terminate the friendship. This will probably make him think about his actions more than hitting him (as being a bouncer he is probably pretty used to taking a few punches and will forget about it almost instantly). His loss of you as friend will hurt him as much as you by the sounds of it....
. It would seem a bit harsh after doing that to then turn on him (but could be a good way of saying "fuck you" if that is how you feel ). Ideally, you should have severed all ties straight away or stick with a decision to remain friends with him.A difficult one and maybe worth talking over with your sister to find out how she would really feal about you remaining friends with him (taking time to explain how much your kids think of him as well). She may understand and accept that he has done nothing to directly hurt you, if so and it is a friendship you feel is worth something then keep it. If not and your family's approval is something that is more important to you, then all you have to do is to explain to him why you will have to terminate the friendship. This will probably make him think about his actions more than hitting him (as being a bouncer he is probably pretty used to taking a few punches and will forget about it almost instantly). His loss of you as friend will hurt him as much as you by the sounds of it....
