Just found out my 8 week old boy is deaf.
#41
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if may just be an infection or some bit of tissue that's blocked the ear up
as difficult as it is to have to wait, make sure that it's the right diagnosis for the problem he's actually got rather than sit there thinking it's one thing or the other as you may be worrying about the wrong problem, or a problem that will have, hopefully, gone away in a few days time
#44
Mate, i don't know you know from Adam and i can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling, i don't have kids so can't comprehend it at all.
But, it is not as bad as you think, these cochlea implants some people have already mentioned work absolute wonders. I work in an nhs hospital and i've seen kids who've had them. You can barely tell they're there.
Even the kids on the ent clinics that they can't do much for seem happy as Larry, as already said if they don't know any different then they won't feel they're missing out.
You and your missus won't be missing out either, you'll still be able to kick a ball about with him and have him help you wash your motor etc. and you'll still be able to talk with him just in a different way to the majority of people you'll talk to. You can make it your own secret language, that just your family know .
Also when i was younger i worked in a pub kitchen with a lad that was profoundly deaf. he could only hear you really if you shouted at him and were facing him so he could read your lips. But everyone adapted to it, and within a few days he was one of the lads. Only thing was you could hear his car from a mile away, had a 2,500 watt stereo in it or something like that iirc
But, it is not as bad as you think, these cochlea implants some people have already mentioned work absolute wonders. I work in an nhs hospital and i've seen kids who've had them. You can barely tell they're there.
Even the kids on the ent clinics that they can't do much for seem happy as Larry, as already said if they don't know any different then they won't feel they're missing out.
You and your missus won't be missing out either, you'll still be able to kick a ball about with him and have him help you wash your motor etc. and you'll still be able to talk with him just in a different way to the majority of people you'll talk to. You can make it your own secret language, that just your family know .
Also when i was younger i worked in a pub kitchen with a lad that was profoundly deaf. he could only hear you really if you shouted at him and were facing him so he could read your lips. But everyone adapted to it, and within a few days he was one of the lads. Only thing was you could hear his car from a mile away, had a 2,500 watt stereo in it or something like that iirc
#45
My youngest daughter was born with goldenhar syndrome and failed all the early hearing tests she has a deformed ear and will probably be almost completely deaf in that ear.
Three years on she is fantastic she talks better than the other 2 ever did and is full of fun and love and boldness.
I wish you luck it is hard and can be very upsetting especially the first time they realise they are different but you still feel all the love in the world for them
Always remember no matter how well you are taking it your misses maybe finding things hard and may not show it as the mother they often blame them selves so make extra time just for her
Three years on she is fantastic she talks better than the other 2 ever did and is full of fun and love and boldness.
I wish you luck it is hard and can be very upsetting especially the first time they realise they are different but you still feel all the love in the world for them
Always remember no matter how well you are taking it your misses maybe finding things hard and may not show it as the mother they often blame them selves so make extra time just for her
#46
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Hi mate,
I am not sure I can be of much help, but I do wish you all the very best. I can imagine it is a real shock to the system. I have a niece in Canada in the same situation. She is now around 5 years old, and I remember talking to my cousin, who did a lot of research into this, and he was quite confident that she would lead very much a normal life. From memory, she has had implants fitted and they seem to work just fine. Technology in the this area is progressing all of the time, so try not to panic as I am sure things will work out for you.
All the best,
Narinder
I am not sure I can be of much help, but I do wish you all the very best. I can imagine it is a real shock to the system. I have a niece in Canada in the same situation. She is now around 5 years old, and I remember talking to my cousin, who did a lot of research into this, and he was quite confident that she would lead very much a normal life. From memory, she has had implants fitted and they seem to work just fine. Technology in the this area is progressing all of the time, so try not to panic as I am sure things will work out for you.
All the best,
Narinder
#47
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First of all, a Deaf child is not the end of the world. You just need to adjust a bit to get things smoothly, that's all. The most important thing is that as long as your child is healthy then all is good.
I am deaf myself and I have processed well so far. I lipread ok (apart from people with hairy beards!) where I ask them to write down on paper, I do not wear hearing aids as I am 100% fully deaf, however it might be different for yours, depending on the loss is. The audiologist will tell you when the time comes.
I am doing a full time job in I.T. for the past 10 years. I lead normal life like others does with little adjustments, i.e. I use subtitles on TV, I go to cinema when they have subtitles on (sometimes they do it for half price ticket)
As others mentioned, there are many support out there. Check in your local Adult Education, they do BSL classes. Might be worth checking out for the local Deaf Club where they might do a "Mothers & Toddlers Group" session where they offer help/suport for Deaf/Hearing parents to a Deaf child.
Hech even your local social services can hep you with equipments for the child, i.e. flashing lights for doorbell or telephone, vibrating alarm, vibrating fire alarm, etc etc.
Others mentioned Cochlear Implants - you might be interested to read about it on my sister's website - she did a Dissertation based on this - Cochlear Implants: to be Deaf or deaf? - this might open up your mind.
If you have any other questions, feel free to PM me.
I am deaf myself and I have processed well so far. I lipread ok (apart from people with hairy beards!) where I ask them to write down on paper, I do not wear hearing aids as I am 100% fully deaf, however it might be different for yours, depending on the loss is. The audiologist will tell you when the time comes.
I am doing a full time job in I.T. for the past 10 years. I lead normal life like others does with little adjustments, i.e. I use subtitles on TV, I go to cinema when they have subtitles on (sometimes they do it for half price ticket)
As others mentioned, there are many support out there. Check in your local Adult Education, they do BSL classes. Might be worth checking out for the local Deaf Club where they might do a "Mothers & Toddlers Group" session where they offer help/suport for Deaf/Hearing parents to a Deaf child.
Hech even your local social services can hep you with equipments for the child, i.e. flashing lights for doorbell or telephone, vibrating alarm, vibrating fire alarm, etc etc.
Others mentioned Cochlear Implants - you might be interested to read about it on my sister's website - she did a Dissertation based on this - Cochlear Implants: to be Deaf or deaf? - this might open up your mind.
If you have any other questions, feel free to PM me.
Last edited by tsutton; 29-06-2009 at 07:38 PM.
#48
formerly beefy-rst-2
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haha, we'll see mate! we'll see! It'll be a laugh when i waste you on the backroads.....I am even going to travel all the way down there to do it on regular occasions. At least my boy isnt going to worry about the loud car that his daddy drives! You know i am really thinking about going down the series 2 route now for some reason......if the docs knew what the likes of me and you got up to in car/bikes they would have a fit!
lol stay mk 3 ,
just dont do it a fucking gay ass white colour !!!!!!
if not , sell that on and get a minty mint mk4 bonus ,
if i had my way id have mk 3 over 4 ,
ill be waiting for ya at the other end of brunters mate ,
one lump or two in your tea ????
#49
First of all, a Deaf clild is not the end of the world. You just need to adjust a bit to get things smoothly, that's all. The most important thing is that as long as your child is healthy then all is good.
I am deaf myself and I have processed well so far. I lipread ok (apart from people with hairy beards!) where I ask them to write down on paper, I do not wear hearing aids as I am 100% fully deaf, however it might be different for yours, depending on the loss is. The audiologist will tell you when the time comes.
I am doing a full time job in I.T. for the past 10 years. I lead normal life like others does with little adjustments, i.e. I use subtitles on TV, I go to cinema when they have subtitles on (sometimes they do it for half price ticket)
As others mentioned, there are many support out there. Check in your local Adult Education, they do BSL classes. Might be worth checking out for the local Deaf Club where they might do a "Mothers & Toddlers Group" session where they offer help/suport for Deaf/Hearing parents to a Deaf child.
Hech even your local social services can hep you with equipments for the child, i.e. flashing lights for doorbell or telephone, vibrating alarm, vibrating fire alarm, etc etc.
Others mentioned Cochlear Implants - you might be interested to read about it on my sister's website - she did a Dissertation based on this - Cochlear Implants: to be Deaf or deaf? - this might open up your mind.
If you have any other questions, feel free to PM me.
I am deaf myself and I have processed well so far. I lipread ok (apart from people with hairy beards!) where I ask them to write down on paper, I do not wear hearing aids as I am 100% fully deaf, however it might be different for yours, depending on the loss is. The audiologist will tell you when the time comes.
I am doing a full time job in I.T. for the past 10 years. I lead normal life like others does with little adjustments, i.e. I use subtitles on TV, I go to cinema when they have subtitles on (sometimes they do it for half price ticket)
As others mentioned, there are many support out there. Check in your local Adult Education, they do BSL classes. Might be worth checking out for the local Deaf Club where they might do a "Mothers & Toddlers Group" session where they offer help/suport for Deaf/Hearing parents to a Deaf child.
Hech even your local social services can hep you with equipments for the child, i.e. flashing lights for doorbell or telephone, vibrating alarm, vibrating fire alarm, etc etc.
Others mentioned Cochlear Implants - you might be interested to read about it on my sister's website - she did a Dissertation based on this - Cochlear Implants: to be Deaf or deaf? - this might open up your mind.
If you have any other questions, feel free to PM me.
ahem.....told you i could waste you on the twisties.....waiting at the other end of brunters eh.... You only drive fast in a straight line???? hehe
#50
christ i am trying to learn this BSl and finding it pretty hard, only remembering the bloody signs! The missus is doing great but i can tseem to remember as much as her.
Anybody know of any decent CD's , DVD's et, i have a couple of things but they aren't very comprehensive. Got a couple of things on them and not very user friendly.
Any training aids would be nice. Got a test coming up!!!
Anybody know of any decent CD's , DVD's et, i have a couple of things but they aren't very comprehensive. Got a couple of things on them and not very user friendly.
Any training aids would be nice. Got a test coming up!!!
#52
na, dont worry about it, we're totally fine with it now, took a bit of gettting used to but seriously there aint anything wrong, he's deaf but when he has his hearing aids in he can hear! Its amazing. He actually smiles when you switch them on, makes my day everytime i do it! We are learning sign anyway just incase. i know some, its been usefull when the missus is too far away and i have been able to ask her where the other wee guy is!!!!
#54
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Cutch, it's unfortunate news but its not the end of the world mate
I used to take 3 children to school, all of them were deaf, and I had to take them from Essex to Brighton, every monday and friday, I knew a little sign before I started with these children, and now i have full blown conversations! I have had contact with their families too, as 2 of the children were brother and sister, and their whole family are deaf. Their older brother used to hang around with the group that I did, so I was always becoming interprator for him and his mate (also deaf)
It is something that will change how you do things, but it's not an impossible task and there is plenty of help out there for you! Sign language is easy to learn, and a lot of it is common sense when you think about it!
About 2 years ago, I myself lost the hearing in my Right ear.....After consultations and tests with the specialist i was told that the hearing in my right ear, will never come back and its called "sudden hearing loss" It affects 1 in 20 adults apparently...i never knew that! My left ear is also not 100%, I can't here low quiet sounds, but tbh i think they have to be extremely quiet...the one thing i do struggle with is deciphering what a sound is....but yet again it something you definately do adapt to! Your son on the other hand, will have known no different so has no need to adapt to it, as its all he has known!
The school i used to take these children to, had quite a few children there with the cochlear implant...these children can hear you the only way you know any different is their speech is not that of a hearing child.
I know that the cochlear implant is not an answer for every deaf person tho....just so you are aware. Hearing aids are another thing...your son may be able to use a hearing aid in his hearing ear to help increase the sound so he can hear! I was told that a hearing aid would be no good for me tho as my right ear has nothing at all....so for an aid to work...there has to be something to aid!
If there is anything i can do to help, i know im the other end of the country to you but still even someone to talk to can help! then let me know!
x
I used to take 3 children to school, all of them were deaf, and I had to take them from Essex to Brighton, every monday and friday, I knew a little sign before I started with these children, and now i have full blown conversations! I have had contact with their families too, as 2 of the children were brother and sister, and their whole family are deaf. Their older brother used to hang around with the group that I did, so I was always becoming interprator for him and his mate (also deaf)
It is something that will change how you do things, but it's not an impossible task and there is plenty of help out there for you! Sign language is easy to learn, and a lot of it is common sense when you think about it!
About 2 years ago, I myself lost the hearing in my Right ear.....After consultations and tests with the specialist i was told that the hearing in my right ear, will never come back and its called "sudden hearing loss" It affects 1 in 20 adults apparently...i never knew that! My left ear is also not 100%, I can't here low quiet sounds, but tbh i think they have to be extremely quiet...the one thing i do struggle with is deciphering what a sound is....but yet again it something you definately do adapt to! Your son on the other hand, will have known no different so has no need to adapt to it, as its all he has known!
The school i used to take these children to, had quite a few children there with the cochlear implant...these children can hear you the only way you know any different is their speech is not that of a hearing child.
I know that the cochlear implant is not an answer for every deaf person tho....just so you are aware. Hearing aids are another thing...your son may be able to use a hearing aid in his hearing ear to help increase the sound so he can hear! I was told that a hearing aid would be no good for me tho as my right ear has nothing at all....so for an aid to work...there has to be something to aid!
If there is anything i can do to help, i know im the other end of the country to you but still even someone to talk to can help! then let me know!
x
#55
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I would say the best thing you and your missus/family can do, is to learn sign language ASAP, and use it to communicate with each other, so you remain good at it. That way you can bring the lad up on it
I know a family, where the entire family is deaf, except the 2 kids, but thats obviously slightly different.
I know a family, where the entire family is deaf, except the 2 kids, but thats obviously slightly different.
#57
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Don't know if anybody's already told you about these but, http://www.ndcs.co.uk/ - loads of info on there, should be able to find out about local support etc as well.
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my brother was born deaf, by three he'd started to gain use of one ear though,
it'd his learning curve off a little, and hes not quite as eloquent as other kids his age (he's 12 now) he's still partially deaf, tends to shout rather than talk and its impossible for him to be quiet, but its no more hassle than a 'normal' kid, they know no different, so you just have to adapt to them.
chances are though he'll grow out of it (partially at least) with time!
it'd his learning curve off a little, and hes not quite as eloquent as other kids his age (he's 12 now) he's still partially deaf, tends to shout rather than talk and its impossible for him to be quiet, but its no more hassle than a 'normal' kid, they know no different, so you just have to adapt to them.
chances are though he'll grow out of it (partially at least) with time!
#59
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Just take your time mate, when our daughter was born premature and in SCBU it felt like a whole new world we had been flung into with new terms and words we had no idea about! I went a bit obsessive about googling everything and totally overwhelmed myself at first, so my advice would just be to take things slowly and understand the basics first then research more because I totally confused myself. All the best.
#60
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Fantastic news that the hearing aids are working so well, lets hope that even if over time is hearing degrades that science advances mean that they can continue to update them with new ones that match the new requirements.
Great that you are learning sign language anyway though just in case
Brilliant to hear how its going, Ive wondered a couple of times how you were getting on but didnt want to ask in case it was bad news and you didnt want to talk about it!
Great that you are learning sign language anyway though just in case
Brilliant to hear how its going, Ive wondered a couple of times how you were getting on but didnt want to ask in case it was bad news and you didnt want to talk about it!
#61
Cutch, it's unfortunate news but its not the end of the world mate
I used to take 3 children to school, all of them were deaf, and I had to take them from Essex to Brighton, every monday and friday, I knew a little sign before I started with these children, and now i have full blown conversations! I have had contact with their families too, as 2 of the children were brother and sister, and their whole family are deaf. Their older brother used to hang around with the group that I did, so I was always becoming interprator for him and his mate (also deaf)
It is something that will change how you do things, but it's not an impossible task and there is plenty of help out there for you! Sign language is easy to learn, and a lot of it is common sense when you think about it!
About 2 years ago, I myself lost the hearing in my Right ear.....After consultations and tests with the specialist i was told that the hearing in my right ear, will never come back and its called "sudden hearing loss" It affects 1 in 20 adults apparently...i never knew that! My left ear is also not 100%, I can't here low quiet sounds, but tbh i think they have to be extremely quiet...the one thing i do struggle with is deciphering what a sound is....but yet again it something you definately do adapt to! Your son on the other hand, will have known no different so has no need to adapt to it, as its all he has known!
The school i used to take these children to, had quite a few children there with the cochlear implant...these children can hear you the only way you know any different is their speech is not that of a hearing child.
I know that the cochlear implant is not an answer for every deaf person tho....just so you are aware. Hearing aids are another thing...your son may be able to use a hearing aid in his hearing ear to help increase the sound so he can hear! I was told that a hearing aid would be no good for me tho as my right ear has nothing at all....so for an aid to work...there has to be something to aid!
If there is anything i can do to help, i know im the other end of the country to you but still even someone to talk to can help! then let me know!
x
I used to take 3 children to school, all of them were deaf, and I had to take them from Essex to Brighton, every monday and friday, I knew a little sign before I started with these children, and now i have full blown conversations! I have had contact with their families too, as 2 of the children were brother and sister, and their whole family are deaf. Their older brother used to hang around with the group that I did, so I was always becoming interprator for him and his mate (also deaf)
It is something that will change how you do things, but it's not an impossible task and there is plenty of help out there for you! Sign language is easy to learn, and a lot of it is common sense when you think about it!
About 2 years ago, I myself lost the hearing in my Right ear.....After consultations and tests with the specialist i was told that the hearing in my right ear, will never come back and its called "sudden hearing loss" It affects 1 in 20 adults apparently...i never knew that! My left ear is also not 100%, I can't here low quiet sounds, but tbh i think they have to be extremely quiet...the one thing i do struggle with is deciphering what a sound is....but yet again it something you definately do adapt to! Your son on the other hand, will have known no different so has no need to adapt to it, as its all he has known!
The school i used to take these children to, had quite a few children there with the cochlear implant...these children can hear you the only way you know any different is their speech is not that of a hearing child.
I know that the cochlear implant is not an answer for every deaf person tho....just so you are aware. Hearing aids are another thing...your son may be able to use a hearing aid in his hearing ear to help increase the sound so he can hear! I was told that a hearing aid would be no good for me tho as my right ear has nothing at all....so for an aid to work...there has to be something to aid!
If there is anything i can do to help, i know im the other end of the country to you but still even someone to talk to can help! then let me know!
x
Fantastic news that the hearing aids are working so well, lets hope that even if over time is hearing degrades that science advances mean that they can continue to update them with new ones that match the new requirements.
Great that you are learning sign language anyway though just in case
Brilliant to hear how its going, Ive wondered a couple of times how you were getting on but didnt want to ask in case it was bad news and you didnt want to talk about it!
Great that you are learning sign language anyway though just in case
Brilliant to hear how its going, Ive wondered a couple of times how you were getting on but didnt want to ask in case it was bad news and you didnt want to talk about it!
Signs pretty cool, some of the signs are self explanatory but me trying to remember some of the otehr ones is just not happening. I aint the best for learning stuff!! You know we can get all sorts of help, found out the other day that we can get 25% off argos and comet!!!! Should help..
Last edited by cutch; 09-11-2009 at 07:12 AM.
#62
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Thats great that he already has been fitted with aids, and they are working too
I haven't personally done any courses on BSL, I have just picked up on what i've been taught by deaf friends of mine and the children i used to take to school Ive searched up on youtube, and found songs and everything, which is quite good when ya know the words and the sign language for it! lol
Well done to your Mrs for learning so quickly A lot of the signs are commen sense, but only if your in that way of thinking...if ya get me! lol
I know that here there is evening courses at college, but i've not been and found out about it, so dont know how often it is, whether its once a week or what?! lol
I saw a mate of mine the other day who i haven't seen for ages and was surprised at how much sign i remembered and so was he lol
x
I haven't personally done any courses on BSL, I have just picked up on what i've been taught by deaf friends of mine and the children i used to take to school Ive searched up on youtube, and found songs and everything, which is quite good when ya know the words and the sign language for it! lol
Well done to your Mrs for learning so quickly A lot of the signs are commen sense, but only if your in that way of thinking...if ya get me! lol
I know that here there is evening courses at college, but i've not been and found out about it, so dont know how often it is, whether its once a week or what?! lol
I saw a mate of mine the other day who i haven't seen for ages and was surprised at how much sign i remembered and so was he lol
x
#63
it's nice to see you are all getting on ok i know how hard these things can be as we all have different hopes for our kids my oldest is slightly autistic and it took my wife years to admit it, he is slightly different from other boys his age but he's a complete genius and they make you so proud in other ways glad everything is coming together for you mate
#64
*** Sierra RS Custard ***
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Yeah everythings going good mate, they work brilliantly, here he is a couple of months ago. The size of these things is amazing! We get new moulds for him every two weeks as he is growing so fast. they put anything we want insid the moulds, fottball teams etc we had little pumpkins in for halloween.
Signs pretty cool, some of the signs are self explanatory but me trying to remember some of the otehr ones is just not happening. I aint the best for learning stuff!! You know we can get all sorts of help, found out the other day that we can get 25% off argos and comet!!!! Should help..
#65
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Ive been asked before to show someone the alphabet and now i end up doing it tooooo quickly!! lol It's all in the practice!!
x
#66
I know the alphabet and a bunch of other words, can tell people where i live, my name etc. but finding it really hard to remember. My memory is well known or rather the lack of it!!!
yeah the NHS are fantastic, we were at a NDCS weekend and it seemed like we had the best experience out of all the couples that were there, some of them had had a rough time and the service they had received was shocking.
The wee man was given his aids when he was a 3 months old. They say he is progressing perfectly, he should talk perfectly normally etc and be able to go to "normal" school.
yeah the NHS are fantastic, we were at a NDCS weekend and it seemed like we had the best experience out of all the couples that were there, some of them had had a rough time and the service they had received was shocking.
The wee man was given his aids when he was a 3 months old. They say he is progressing perfectly, he should talk perfectly normally etc and be able to go to "normal" school.
#67
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I know the alphabet and a bunch of other words, can tell people where i live, my name etc. but finding it really hard to remember. My memory is well known or rather the lack of it!!!
yeah the NHS are fantastic, we were at a NDCS weekend and it seemed like we had the best experience out of all the couples that were there, some of them had had a rough time and the service they had received was shocking.
The wee man was given his aids when he was a 3 months old. They say he is progressing perfectly, he should talk perfectly normally etc and be able to go to "normal" school.
yeah the NHS are fantastic, we were at a NDCS weekend and it seemed like we had the best experience out of all the couples that were there, some of them had had a rough time and the service they had received was shocking.
The wee man was given his aids when he was a 3 months old. They say he is progressing perfectly, he should talk perfectly normally etc and be able to go to "normal" school.
Keep learning that sign language tho, it will be well worth it!
x
#68
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Cutch, PM me your address and I'll send you my "Sign To Me" CD-ROM, containing over 1,700 clips of BSL & SSE - that will help you to learn.
#69
I didn't see this thread when it was first posted so am glad to come along to see a good positive outlook and response.
Having an 18 month old of my own I fully appreciate that you don't want your child to be at any disadvantage to the other kids and just hope they will have a normal childhood. But what is a normal childhood?? In all reality a kid will be picked on for anything whether it be their height, hair colour or whatever. As long as your boy is healthy and happy it shouldn't matter. Things could be a whole lot worse. Just think, in the future you can talk about what you really think of people right infront of them by using sign. You could have a right laugh. lol
I wish you, your missus and your boy all the best for the future. May you have many smiles.
Having an 18 month old of my own I fully appreciate that you don't want your child to be at any disadvantage to the other kids and just hope they will have a normal childhood. But what is a normal childhood?? In all reality a kid will be picked on for anything whether it be their height, hair colour or whatever. As long as your boy is healthy and happy it shouldn't matter. Things could be a whole lot worse. Just think, in the future you can talk about what you really think of people right infront of them by using sign. You could have a right laugh. lol
I wish you, your missus and your boy all the best for the future. May you have many smiles.
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