One of mine is when people say 'I blew my engine up' or 'I blew my gearbox up', when all you mean is that it ran out of oil and siezed or melted a piston or something. If you actually blew it up, the front of your car would be missing.

Grr mongaloids


That is all

 

the usual ones for me..like the the FORDS thing and the Brought one spending to much time on here i suppose

 

when the misses says Oops wrong whole - aint no oops about it lol!

 

girlfriends not wanting sex as often as me.

 

CLASSIC one today....

Saw some fat trollop in Asda with what looked like her grandchild... Walking around the shop doing their shopping, but had cracked open a pack of sarnies and were eating them before getting to the checkout... That really fucks me right off... Pikeys

Oh, and the wife always leaves cupboard doors / drawers open

 

Im in the same boat as you lol.

 

 

Pick from:

-The tin foil wrapped round the top of Ribena bottles
-When you go in a shop and there's 3 tills but only 1 person serving, so the queue is miles
- Not being any free parking anywhere near a town centre


Easy solution. Dump them, get one that wants it The only thing women always hold over a mans head is Sex. There's billions of girls out there. Even if you only shag 1 a day you'll never work through all of them.

 

Rich....

You should be knighted......

 

People that don't hold conversations. i.e. A phone conversation:

"Hello Mate, How's things"
"Good"
"What ya been up to"
"Nothing"
"What ya up to?"
"Nothing"

OK, why not elaborate?? I just get fooked off and say bye

 

People in traffic queues who stop way short of the car infront, then I pull up close behind them and put my handbrake on. The car infront then gradually rides the clutch and crawls forward to make up the 15ft gap whilst waiting for the lights to change - makes it look like im the tit who stopped short.

 

When the MRS butters her toast, then jam and then wipes all the jam/butter/crumbs excess in the butter tub

Arrgggghhh fucks me right off and i chuck the whole tub in bin
whether its full or not.

Also

Brought means to BRING
Bought means to BUY

Fucking mongoloid chimps

 

spounger/ pikey theifing scum. Get a Job!

 

HAHAH to both of those comments

So true.

Learn basic English please.

RW

 

i hate cunts that have no idea of lane disipline even though if they opened their eyes the big white lines ,the road signs and 6ft high arrows painted on the road make it quite clear.

 

Argh. I know where you're coming from. I use a teaspoon for the marmalade/honey/jam - why does nobody else see sense and do this?

 

posts like this....................................

 

people who decide not to pull in behind you when wanting to take the next exit, but over take then pull infront and hit the brakes in order to make the exit!!!

Or people who see you in a sporty car and think you must aitomatically want to race, that nail it to reach you then sit all over your bumper like they are at silverstone.

 

doughnuts that do 10 mph under the speed limit

Derbyshire county councill for putting the speed limit down on most fast A roads to 50, when there are single track roads leading off them with where you can do 60. Even tho you wouldn't dream of

 

When your driving down the motorway doing a reasonable speed in the fast lane. most people move out of your way untill you reach some pr!ck in a Jag/benz/BMW/Volvo/Scooby, they look in their mirror and think "i'm not moving for that old ford piece of sh!t", then when you move to lane 2 to pass, they speed up, but then they realise their 20k car is no match for that piece of sh!t old escort as you cruise past them, which is normally when you get given the middle finger

Also, the people who stop short of the car infront at traffic lights, or the people who park over 2 spaces.

lets not forget, Chavs, Pikeys, anybody who cannot maintain a decent positive role in society.

there is lots more but i dont want to take up the whole page though

 

Birds leaving the bloody seat down, pisses me right off

 

1 People that maon about nothing
2 People that sit up my arse when the car in front is fooking in my way if i could drive threw him i would (idiots)
3 Fookin women
4 Life an the shite that comes with it like bills!!!
5 People that have nice fast cars an drive at 20 mph in a 40
6 COPPERS
7 Fooking noobs in 1.0l cars that think there in a f1 car
8 Students!! full of ideas that are just shite (wen u lived then il listen)
9 cars, mechanical problems
10 an those twats thats stand out side my house at the bus stop shouting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Goomers who slow down when approaching GREEN traffic lights....

 

and the buggers who slow down for roundabouts when there is no traffic on the roundabout or coming from their right

 

i once went through a green light at 50, the speed limit and almost hit a police car jumping the red coming the other way....

 

you can see for miles, theres no other traffic in sight but they stop and look anyway

 

my mrs finishes things and puts the empty packet,carton etc back rather than the bin,that really pisses me off

 

woman drivers that overtake me when im sat at a red light for roadworks,like they havent seen the 3 signs 500yds up the road,and think that i would stop in the middle of the road for no reason the useless split arse twats

 

Periods/Womens Problems... It's been 8 days now...

Oh and smelly arses, when your doing 'em doggy and you get a whiff of what they had for breakfast.

 

People that make so much noise when eating and showing what they had for breakfast!!!!Also fat birds wearing tight clothing?????its ok to be a bit overweight but dont fudging think you are hot!

 

People who spell hydraulic, 'hydrolic'.

People who spell bought, 'bort'.

 

Vauxhall Astra dirvers!

they're either cops, or nobbers that think its a fast car!

 

Yeah I know, and when you have heavy as fuck 6 paddle clutch (go on, tell me how light your one is I'm really interested lol) that judders and stuff, you don't want the aggro of driving forward that extra 10 foot.

 

People who slow down to 5mph to turn a corner

 

OLD PEOPLE WHO STAND OUTSIDE MY FUCKING FRONT GARDEN WHILE WAITING FOR THE BUS COMMENTING THAT MY WINDOWS DON'T ALL MATCH AND HOW THE WALL UNDERNEATH THE SHUTTERS THAT I TOOK OFF ISN'T PAINTED. IT'S FUCKING FUNNY IS IT? DICKHEADS!!!

...and breath

 

Rod


























Only joking mate