Stu.750

I wont go into much detail but;

a 20yo mate of mine ended his life tuesday night

im struggling a little bit at the moment and , was wondering how people dealt with it.

i currently just want to smash things.

luckily ive got some close mates and amazing GF an , we are helping each other through this , just wondered if anyone alse had any ideas.

C4llyT

Not good mate, got to think of the positives if at all possible.

Maria.

You just gotta concentrate on all the good times you had with him!

Im sure he didnt make the decision to end his life very easily.

Maybe go out for a night to celebrate the life he did have?

Shorty

iTrader: (1)

Cant be nice what your going through Stu, as Maria said, think of the good times you had with him!

Am sure your mate wouldnt want you to sit round and cry about it, he'd want you to go out and enjoy your life and celebrate his.

dazoriginal

think positive mate
talking helps be focused
i'm pretty sure you'll come through this
keep your chin up

Dangerous Malcolm..

I know it's an old cliché but time is the best healer. Just try and focus your anger on something constructive.

Glenn_

iTrader: (1)

Really sorry to hear that mate. Like everyone else has said keep your chin up, have your friends and family round you, i'm sure your friend would want you to remember the good times you had. I hope you dont think i'm being cheeky and i dont mean to offend you but if you need it, my missus may be able to get hold of some decent/useful telephone numbers through work if you ever wanted someone to talk to (i.e bereavrment counselling). Sometimes it just helps to talk to someone outside of the equasion, just pm me.

Psycho Warren

iTrader: (5)

Try looking on here: http://www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk/

Ultimately is a personal experience and unique to you. Just have the foresight to recognise if you arent able to move forward and its effecting your lifeseverely beyond what would be considered a normal grieving period.

Stu.750

Thanks everyone , ill have a look , all of our circle of friends are in the same position so were helping each other as much as we can

Glad there are some good people still out there

Ellie

sorry to hear about your mate, very sad.
im glad u have your girlfriends and friends around u. must be really hard though.
As others have said, stay positive and time will heal.
He's in peace now and thats what he wanted, remember the good times x

matts1

If possible try to look on it like this, you mate decided that he no longer wanted to be around for whatever reason, he is happier now than when he was alive.

Remember the good times and remember that he wouldn't want to see those he loved in pain, but had to do what he had to do, and so celebrate his life and be happy that he is happier where ever his is.

I am sure it aint easy mate, time will heal.

Nicole

From alot of experience of losing people close to me i can honestly say time is the ultimate healer. 2 years ago my world fell apart when my dad died suddenly. I thought i would never smile again, but hour by hour soon turned into day by day and taking things day by day is the best advice i can offer. Some days will be alot harder that others for you and your friends but honestly it does get easier....

I never foget the pain and the pain doesn't lessen, i just feel it less often if that maks sense. At first it was with me 24 hours a day seven days a week but now its with me every day but not every hour of every day. It still takes my breath away some days and other days i can think of him and smile with a tear but honestly time is the best healer.

I found that talking was he best thing for me, as soon as i began to shut myself off from people things got alot worse. Keep talking and remembering him and talk about the good and bad stuff he did, it makes things seem more real if that makes any sense at all?

Hope things improve for you soon....

Iain Mac

I lost a friend in just the same way. At the funeral his doctor explained he'd been suffering from an illness called depression, but had kept it hidden from almost everyone. One day he woke up and killed himself, and the doctor reckons he probably wouldn't have been too aware of what he was doing.

I have no idea why, but I found that strangely comforting - up till then I was so pissed off that he hadn't asked for help or just had a chat about what was wrong.

Remember the positives, and try not to be angry with him.

Mrs Jtechsaff

Do you have any photos of him?? When I lost a friend, we dug out all our old photos and shared the memories. We now have a photo album which celebrated her life. As we talked we all cried a lot, got really cross but we also had a real laugh.

It made me realise that I shouldnt forget our friendship but I also had a lot of other friends to care for and who cared for me.

Good Luck mate x