the strangest thing
#1
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From: Little India
the strangest thing
has just happened
one of my dads pisshead mates has just knocked on the door
the conversation went along the lines of:
pissyhead:"mumble mubble is your dad in mumble mumble?"
me:"yes"
pissyhead:"mumble mumble"
me:"but he's asleep"
pissyhead:"mumble? mumble! mumble mumble <produces fag> just walking home past your house and saw the light on <wink wink> mumble mumble <hint hint> mumble sluring"
pissyhead:"?"
pissyhead:"if you could help me mumble"
me:"let me see"
me:"have we got any matches?"
wife:"we have an electric cooker and a torch, why do we need matches?"
mum:"close the door in his face, we don't want his sort here, your dad would kick his arse if you wake him up, tell him to push off"
me:"no, we don't have any matches sorry"
pissyhead:<looks at fag which he's dropped and it's now wet> "mumble mumble" <approches door> "listen sonny, i would mumble appreciate mumble slur mumble slur" <looks like he's about to camp outside the door
me:<looking around all emberresed i spy a lighter in the picture rail and hand it over to him>
pissyhead:<burns finger and can't light the fag, figures out it's wet, dries it out with the flame, snaps the end off, sparks up, smoke goes everywhere in the house>
me:<close the door in his face, turn lights off>
don't know weather i should laugh or just tell the old man in the morning and see what happens
i know my old dear won't let him come down the stairs without proclaiming it all across the town
one of my dads pisshead mates has just knocked on the door
the conversation went along the lines of:
pissyhead:"mumble mubble is your dad in mumble mumble?"
me:"yes"
pissyhead:"mumble mumble"
me:"but he's asleep"
pissyhead:"mumble? mumble! mumble mumble <produces fag> just walking home past your house and saw the light on <wink wink> mumble mumble <hint hint> mumble sluring"
pissyhead:"?"
pissyhead:"if you could help me mumble"
me:"let me see"
me:"have we got any matches?"
wife:"we have an electric cooker and a torch, why do we need matches?"
mum:"close the door in his face, we don't want his sort here, your dad would kick his arse if you wake him up, tell him to push off"
me:"no, we don't have any matches sorry"
pissyhead:<looks at fag which he's dropped and it's now wet> "mumble mumble" <approches door> "listen sonny, i would mumble appreciate mumble slur mumble slur" <looks like he's about to camp outside the door
me:<looking around all emberresed i spy a lighter in the picture rail and hand it over to him>
pissyhead:<burns finger and can't light the fag, figures out it's wet, dries it out with the flame, snaps the end off, sparks up, smoke goes everywhere in the house>
me:<close the door in his face, turn lights off>
don't know weather i should laugh or just tell the old man in the morning and see what happens
i know my old dear won't let him come down the stairs without proclaiming it all across the town
#3
Thread Starter
Resident Wrestling Legend
iTrader: (3)
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 50,018
Likes: 258
From: Little India
if i knew how to use some of the things to make the words different colours and stuff , t would have been much better
i di dend up finding the air freshener and spraying a liberal dose of it, inside AND outside the house, just to make sure
i di dend up finding the air freshener and spraying a liberal dose of it, inside AND outside the house, just to make sure
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