RigPig

Subject: Wife 1.0


Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed
that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a
lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed
itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system
activity.
Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Beer Drinking 50, Hunting and
Fishing 7.5, and Golf 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever
selected.
I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend
7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!
Thanks,
______________________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem about which men are complaining. Many
people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is
just
a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM
and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also
impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is
impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system
once
installed.
You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to
not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual
under"Warnings-Alimony/Child-Support". I recommend that you keep Wife
10
and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the
background
application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.
The best course of action is to enter the command
C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE
command before the system will return to normal anyway.
Although expensive, Wife 1.0 is a great program. However,
it tends to be very high maintenance.
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean
and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Pay Bills 4.2. However, be very careful
how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to
launch tthe program Nag Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to
improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software.
I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!
WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstance, install Secretary
With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and
will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

Lou Lou.

3drstretch

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