Friday Jokes..................
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There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.
Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 AM.
The next day at 8:45 AM there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.
The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee.
He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor.
When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.
At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's.
She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles.
The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter.
After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena .
"I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday"
Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mummy, Mummy, she yelled,
"We were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four,
but I counted to 10. See? 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde?" the girl asked.
"Yes, it's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy,"
she yelled, "We were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids said up to D, but I said it up to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?"
"Yes, It's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy!"
she yelled, "We were in gym class today, and when we were showering, all
the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!"
She lifted up her tank top to reveal a pair of 36 C's.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?"
No, honey, Its because you're 24
Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 AM.
The next day at 8:45 AM there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.
The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee.
He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor.
When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.
At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's.
She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles.
The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter.
After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena .
"I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday"
Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mummy, Mummy, she yelled,
"We were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four,
but I counted to 10. See? 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde?" the girl asked.
"Yes, it's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy,"
she yelled, "We were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids said up to D, but I said it up to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?"
"Yes, It's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy!"
she yelled, "We were in gym class today, and when we were showering, all
the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!"
She lifted up her tank top to reveal a pair of 36 C's.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?"
No, honey, Its because you're 24
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