Weird as shit!

Got in my van at 6:45 this morn, left for work. Drove for 1hr, arrived at work at 7:45.

Parked van in the depot and spent the next hour sorting out my jobs and loading my screens.

At 8:45 I got in my van to pull it out and immediately thought I could smell what smelled like puke!

Pulled van outside and had a look around - strong smell of vomit in the front of the van! But no sign of any there! I know I didn't puke in it, and no-one else has been in the front of my van, and neither of the front doors were opened while it was in the branch (and windows closed)

ON my passenger seat were the items I had there first thing in the morning when I first got in it (and it didn't smell like puke then);

- my fleece
- a towel
- a phone charger
- a CD case
- some paperwork

I cleared these off the seat and noticed on the CD case (that was the first thing on the seat with everything else on top of it) had a sticky brown residue on one edge - only a little. Bit like coke syrup in texture. I gave it a sniff - smelled like shit

Nothing else had anything on it!

Then on the seat itself I noticed a damp mark - bout half the size of the seat. Gave it a sniff - reeked of puke!!!!! Also smells a bit like that smell when you drive past a farm on a baking hot day - nasty manure/cowshit smell

But it was barely damp to touch, just looked damp...

But I am totally confused as to how it got there! No marks on anything else on the seat, and all items were on top of where this damp mark was, nothing else smells bad, just this one "stain" on the seat - I didn't put anything there that could have leaked, no food or drink. No-one else went in the van, wasn't there at 7:45 but was there at 8:45!

I emptied an entire can of Oust onto it, along with an entire can of room air freshener, and have three magic tree's and a room/windowsill aire freshener in the van all day and it still stinks Nearly crashed the van after inhaling the fumes from the Oust and air freshener aswell

Totally fucking confused!

Anyway - whats a good way to get smells out of seats? Any good products to use? Steam cleaner? Can't seem to get the seat materla off, as I would bung it in the washing machine and hose the foam down if I could!

Don't really wanna pay a valeter!!!!

But I gotta pick a bird up on Saturday and don't really want my van smelling of shit n puke

 

 

.....good film.....john travolta..........

 

Random puke lol

 

Whip seat out and pressure wash it you filthy scabby smelly cunt

 

Lots of help you cunts

It wasn't me! I didn't do shit! (literally) hence the phenomenom bit - it seems to have come from nowhere! And I don't like my van smelling like puke

 

Borrow a carpet cleaner.

 

I don't think cleaning it is the concern. It's how it got there.

 

So someone slipped into your van to sabotage it in a 'crazy work mate' kind of way, felt a rumble in the guts, thought they'd leave an air biscuit in the cab for extra comedy effect.. followed through and basically left the liquid content of their mornings roadside cafe 'greasy fry' behind.

 

What's removal, 4 bolts and an occupancy sensor at most usually, and 10 minutes.

 

you found a odd looking stain on a seat ..... you got on your knees and had a good scratch n sniff

 

Benni - it fucking is! It's stinking in there and I don't want it too! I need to get it clean so it don't stink!

lardy -

C4lly - It's a folding seat (two bits fold and move) and is a pain to take out! Might see if the base only can be removed but it looks like it'll be a cunt to get out and get it apart!

Gonna try a mini steam cleaner 2morrow if I get a chance, if not I'll have to strip it out and pressure wash the fucker

What stuff is good for cleaning interiors tho? Last thing I used years ago was GROOM or something like that from halfords (was a foam thing in a can)

 

Ah right, wet and dry type affair then?
Plenty of some kind of all purpose cleaner too.

 

if your picking up a bird in a shonky van i doubt it smelling of sick/shit is gonna make much odds on the good impression front really anyhow

even a RS Turbo is a better 1st impression

question is, whos been pooing on your seat from work on the sly? next time hide next to your van with a spike bat, then when they go to curl one out, blammo

 

Stav - she does actually understand the fact that I can't afford to own my own house AND a car, so I ain't worried about it being in the van - she's been in it many times before

But it didn't smell like puke

I didn't see anyone in or near my van this morn, and the stuff on the seat was unmoved!

 

its weird, you aint got a little animal in the van have you...like a rat or something hiding...


talking of rats a guy at work told me about a rat that had climbed in an airbox on some car, and everytime they accelerated the engine started to die, turns out the "dead rat" was being sucked up and cutting off the air....

 

You know what - I did actually check for that! Couldn't find fuck all

 

You're van's possessed

 

Jet wash and upholstery cleaner 'summat 2000', fucked if I can remember the name but its a green spray tub,
Jet wash the seat, spray the cleaner on, scrub it, jet wash again and then leave in the sun to dry out, your seat will look like its from an 08

 

thats sounds like anal leakage,im not going to explain, go look it up in Wiki or somewhere

 

Benni get a lift in with you?
(Don't tell the dole people)

 

Fabreze

 

Take your own dump in there - You can never smell your own shit.

Benni.

 

omg thrush, u have gone to new lows. but dnt post it up on a forum. Take a shit somewere else in future and not in ur van. you kids never learn. pmsl