i forgot one

dislocated my collar bone, ran into one of them swing poles and bent the bone up and over (or is it under and behind) the other bit so my arm was pointing up like superman

properly sparko'd i was for a few minutes

the ambulance got me to hospital and they gave me something to numb the pain and then slowly eased my arm down again until it went "click" as the bone sorted itself out

my right collar bone is now visably "bent" and my left collarbone is dead straight

i also lost a bit of my ear as it was hanging off, evander holyfield style after a mauling from lion mike tyson