Thanks for all the replies guys - it was a hard thing for me to actually write this thread as I am not usually one for talking about personal issues in the open...

Some points addressed....

I DO know both sides of the story and not just one side. My father made a concious descision to leave my family as it wasn't what he wanted and he chose a "better" life elsewhere.

Talking to him will not allow to decide if he really is the "bastard I think he is" - I know him inside out. This will not change matters

I do NOT want anything to do with him regardless - I don't want to see him or talk to him.

I was 19/20 when he left. My older brother is 3 years older, my sisters are 3 years and 6yrs younger than me. I do not know WHY they have accepted him back where I can't - I don't talk about it with them either.

Why do I not want to see him? Cos I am as stubborn a fucker as he is, and I also stand behind decisions I have made. If he really wanted to leave so badly, and didn't want anything to do with us, then he should have some fucking integrity and stay the fuck away. Not fuck off to suit himself THEN decide he still wants to see us kids. Bollocks - as I said, close a door, then it should remain closed.

Carfixz echoe's my sentiments exactly - he is my biolgica parent, but he is NOT my "dad".

Katie - he is already dead to me, so that bridge is already crossed. Nothing that can happen in the future will change my mind/feelings.

To those that mention "everyone makes mistakes" - sure, thats fine. But it obviously wasn't a mistake as he still doesn't want to be a member of this family...

Those saying that "if you wrote this thread you must still be unsure if you want to cut him out completely" - no, I am sure I want to cut him out, and I don't want any reconciliation. The reason for the thread is despite my strong feelings about him, I am NOT a cunt, and I do not want to maliciously hurt him by sending them back. That is not my intention. Sending them back would be my way of trying to drive home the nail that says "have you got the fucking message yet - leave me alone.

On the other side of the coin, I still feel he DOES owe me, and I want to keep the money to show that. It's not about the money per say - the item in question could be a fucking frog for all I care - it's the principal.

The above said, I don't want him to think that by accepting the "gifts" that he has won me over, as that is very much not the case. He hasn't won shit - actually he's lost, as I have his "gifts" and he still not got shit from me. But then I might feel like a cunt (not cause I feel guilty or whatever, but cos I don't like intentionall hurting anyone - whether I like them or not. I am a very moral person, but often confused )

I still don't know what to do tho.