As you will be aware by now, Passion Ford has been purchased by the mighty Globex Corporation to become part of our ever burgeoning portfolio of busy internet forums. Having struck a particularly lucrative deal with one Monsieur Petrucci [now of his newly purchased private island "Es Kos" situated amongst the islands of French Polynesia] we would like to take this opportunity to set the record straight on our planned changes for the site.

Firstly, we will be stripping the site of all it's useful commercial resources and moving them into more financially viable areas of Globex Corp:

1. Mr Stewart Sanderson of Motor Sport Developments. Although he was not initially receptive to the idea of selling us all of his intellectual property. Apparently he would rather give it away FREE on the internet. Or by charging an arbitrary fee through magazines or very competitive and low rates as a total service through his own business. Globex Corp would like to distance itself from any of these low profit making actions.

2. User Bosch-Dealer. Immediately we have seen the potential of an individual who can mix humour with severe dillusion and antagonise users into increasing post counts uneccessarily, thus making the site a more attractive proposition to potential advertisers. We shall be transferring his valuable skills to our "Ghetto Gold" forum, where people of a certain age can live out their fantasies of "pimpin it up gangsta style". If any of the current users are also middle aged men who are into the Hip Hop lifestyle, please join in here: http://www.ghettogold.globexcorp.com fo shizzle.

3. Users Ginge and Dojj. Some advertisers measure potential success by the amount of wordage used on a daily basis. These two users will be the foundation of our financial draw to prospective investors, getting through on average 4 million words a week between them. Although without these 2 users Passion Ford may get through half the amount of words, it should speed the site up and their services will be welcomed on a number of other sites. Firstly http://www.insomnia.globexcorp.com where we have users waiting to read posts in order to help them fall asleep and secondly: http://www.constipationrelief.globexcorp.com, which is fairly self explanitory on account of being able to bore the stuff out of people.

4. Users from the Muppet Room. Globex Corp recently instigated a pay per view system in the Muppet Room to root out the hardcore users. All of these users will be transferred to secure storage for use in medical research.

5. All Moderators. Globex Corp is fully aware of the characteristics of the traditional internet Moderator. They will therefore all be transferred to: http://www.modernnazis.globexcorp.com where they can chat online to people of similar beliefs and attitudes.

6. User Jay. A talented and approachable user who will be the new cover boy of Globex Corps site: http://www.aggressivehomosexualsinvests.globexcorp.com

The remaining users of Passion Ford are welcomed to continue to enjoy the site in it's current guise. After Globex Corp's extensive psychometric evaluation of the site and it's users, the company is aware that there may be a mass exodus to http://www.allifuckingdoiswhinge.globexcorp.com but the new management hope you can stay with the site that many of you have been members of for many years.

We look forward to a financially rewarding partnership.

Director of Globalisation
Globex Corporation