One day, at a bus stop there was a girl who was wearing a skintight
miniskirt. When the bus arrived and it was her turn to get on, she
realized
that her skirt was so tight she couldn't get her foot high enough to reach
to step.
>
>Thinking it would give her enough slack to raise her leg, she reached
back
and unzipped her skirt a little. She still could not reach the step.
Embarrassed, she reached back once again to unzip it a little more. Still,
she couldn't reach the step. So, with her skirt zipper halfway down, she
reached back and unzipped her skirt all the way. Thinking that she could
get
on the step now, she lifted up her leg only to realize that she still
couldn't reach the step.
>
>So, seeing how embarrassed the girl was, the man standing behind her put
his hands around her waist and lifted her up on to the first step of the
bus. The girl turned around furiously and said, "How dare you touch my
body
that way, I don't even know you!"
>
>Shocked, the man says, "Well, ma'am, after you reached around and
unzipped
my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were friends."





A man boarded an aircraft at Heathrow and took his seat. As he settled in,
he noticed a very beautiful woman boarding the plane. He realised she was
heading straight towards his seat and bingo! She took the seat right beside
him. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out ,"Business trip or
holiday?" She turned, smiled enchantingly and said "Business. I'm going to
the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States".

He swallowed hard - here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting
next to him, and she was going to a meeting for nymphomaniacs! Struggling to
maintain his
composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?"
"Lecturer," she responded, "I use my experience to debunk some of the
popular myths about sexuality." "Really", he smiled, "What myths are those?"
"Well," she explained, "One popular myth is that African American men are
the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is
most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that French men
are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Greek descent. We have
also found that the best potential lovers in all categories are the Irish".

Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed, "I'm sorry", she said,
"I really shouldn't be discussing this with you, I don't even know your
name."

"Tonto", the man said... "Tonto Papadopoulos, but my friends call me Paddy."

 

 

 

 

 

 

thanks! Put a laugh on my day!