1:

you are going into a petrol station to fill up with fuel, not do the equvalent of a weekly shop before paying while leaving your car at the pump you ignorant self centred twat!

2:

Women - Once you have paid and returned to your car, get in turn the key and fuck off!
dont spend 10 mins checking you make-up in the mirror, changing your fucking shoes and chatting on your mobile phone before moving away from the pump

3:

Queue in the appropriate late that facilitates fueling your car properly (EG in the lane that means your fuel cap is next to the pump!
The number of fucking twats that pull up and the stretch the fucking pump over the car because the fuel filler is on the other side.....Cunts!

4:

(My personal bug bear)

If both pumps are being used, then both vehicles move away at the same time and there are two more cars queueing, if your in font GOTO THE 1ST FUCKING PUMP YOU TWAT!
DON'T MOVE TO THE BACK PUMP AND GET OUT LEAVING THE FRONT PUMP EMPTY AND MAKE THE PERSON BEHIND YOU GO ROUND YOU TO USE THE PUMP IN FRONT YOU IGNORANT TWAT!

rant over lol