bud-weis

apologies if you have seen it before, and for the lines
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the >>batteries >> >are flat? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know >>there >> >is not enough? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion >>stars, >> >but check when you say the paint is wet? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why do they use sterilised needles for death by lethal injection? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you >>throw >> >a revolver at him? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >What is the speed of darkness? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people >>at the >> >Special Olympics? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be >>twice as >> >cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others >>doing >> >here? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only >>seem >> >longer? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If someone with a split personality threatens to commit suicide, >>is it a >> >hostage situation >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Can you cry under water? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >What level of importance must a person have , before they are >>considered >> >assassinated instead of just murdered? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why does a round pizza come in a square box? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it >>would be >> >a good idea to put wheels on bigger suitcases ? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies >>wake up, >> >like, every two hours? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a >>hearing? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in >> >binoculars to look at things on the ground? >> >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >---------------------------------------- >> >Why do doctors, when they ask you to strip, leave the room or >>close the >> >cubicle curtain while you change? ..... They're still going to >>see you >> >naked anyway. >> >-------