When I went in to the kitchen I looked out the window just before I turned the light on and saw some fooking wanker was lying on my boot and the back part of the roof of the car, fooking little scrote was away in a flash with my fooking aerial-just why??? Why can't they just fook off chavvy little fook wits.

Pissed off now,no point phoning old bill cos it's a nothing really,just more of an iritation,there was a small dent which just popped out.

Where's the beer???