thats exactly the problem nik, me and deb have been good friends for years!! Shes said its because she doesnt trust me. but i think the biggest problem for her is the fact that ive told her that i dont want kids or marriage,so she thinks i wont commit, stupid I know, its not the fact that i dont want them, its the fact that its scares me shitless, every relationship ive had has ended in heartache mainly for me, and on the whole im not that bad i boyfriend, ive watched my mum go through two horrendous marriages and being the oldest ive had to pick up the pieces when they have collapsed. Its just all left me with a sour taste in my mouth. Im just so used to being let down that i put up every barrier possible and now someone that truely loved me and was devoted to me has walked

And now the stupid thing is idont want her to be a learning curve for me, i want to work towards having the trust in our relationship to aim for those things with her...
But she doesnt believe me due to the sudden change of mind...and she thinks im just sayin it to get her back.