In the summer, a friend of mine was (and still is) in a financial mire, but she had borrowed a significant sum of money from a relative. This relative was pressuring her for their money back which is fair comment in my book, as it had been outstanding for some time. She comes to me in tears, tells me how badly in debt she is. I listen, have a think about it and tell her to come and see me, but bring all her credit card statements, bank statements etc with her and I'll try and sort it out.

She comes over, I disect the mess and discover that she actually owes well into 5 figures and in real terms has absolutely nothing to show for it. She's basically blown it all on nothing. OK, what's done is done, can't change it so I set about sorting it out.

Initially a wrote her out a cheque to clear one of her credit cards, fine, one problem out the way and but said she had to give me the money back for that when she got paid, which she duly did. I set up a repayment programme for her to try and clear the other plastic debts (no loan company will touch her) then tackled the relatives debt. Cut a long story short I lent her the money for that, so bought the debt. She started booing again, thankyou thankyou thankyou etc, but said it would likely be some time before she could pay me back. I said fine, don't mind waiting - as long as she concentrates on clearing the other debts. She agreed.

Anyway, she said to me a few weeks back how did I want paying back, dribs and drabs or in one lump. I said no big deal, wait until it's all together and you can afford it. Think I've been pretty reasonable up to now don't you ?

Goes out with my brother last night, and him and her work for the same firm. Bro tells me they all got £1k bonus last month........and she hasn't said a word to me about it. OK, in reality it's none of my business, but when she owes me a chunk of money I think it then DOES become my business. I talk to her every day, so it's hardly like we've never talk and she's had a month to enlighten me, but hasn't. Sent her a text last night about it asking her what she did with the money, she said Christmas and clearing some of the debts. But not the one to me.

What I'm pissed off about is that she never told me. If she had been upfront and said she got the bonus but needed some for Christmas and was putting the rest off debts I'd have been fine, but it's that she's tried to be sneaky about it and I've found out.

Am I being unreasonable ? Sorry for the epic