Interesting problem (passports)
#41
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
i know its hard but theres fuck all REALLY you can do, its not fair on the kids but they WILL know the truth in the future
hes gonna have to loose the holiday and just wait till there old enough, tell him to put a bit away "hidden" then when he can tell her hes taking them to somewhere in europe but take them to australia,,,, women are proper cunts when they have kids im afraid,,,,, its the ONLY way they can fight
LOADS of guys go through this, my mate had to get back with hes missus to see hes fucking kid belive it or not,,,,,, that was HER rules too even though SHE threw him out on to the street,,,, she discovered life is hard without money
tell him to get on with it best as he can and NEVER slag there mum off infront of them,,,, when they are older they will SEE the truth,,, NEVER lie to your kids then you never have to explain yourself
sorry to hear this though
hes gonna have to loose the holiday and just wait till there old enough, tell him to put a bit away "hidden" then when he can tell her hes taking them to somewhere in europe but take them to australia,,,, women are proper cunts when they have kids im afraid,,,,, its the ONLY way they can fight
LOADS of guys go through this, my mate had to get back with hes missus to see hes fucking kid belive it or not,,,,,, that was HER rules too even though SHE threw him out on to the street,,,, she discovered life is hard without money
tell him to get on with it best as he can and NEVER slag there mum off infront of them,,,, when they are older they will SEE the truth,,, NEVER lie to your kids then you never have to explain yourself
sorry to hear this though
#42
just finding my feet
mate i spend 7k trying to see my kid,,, she was a bitch about things and just like your mates ex
then she was ORDERED to let me see the kid,,,,, i was given half custody due to the court realising SHE WAS LYING,,,,,, then after a few months she stopped again so i had to give up
its hard but there no point wasting cash on someone when the courts do fuck all but repeat what we already know BUT charge the father for it as hes the only one with a job
i would have tried to be nice but theres ALOT more to my story that i aint gonna go into too much apart from she said alot of lies about me and i fell for it like a prick to help PROVE her lies !!
hes best just seeing hes kids and doing local holidays,,,, camping and caravans are fun for kids,,,,, im gonna do one this year ( ok its a caravan in the south of france but thats just for the beach)
good luck
then she was ORDERED to let me see the kid,,,,, i was given half custody due to the court realising SHE WAS LYING,,,,,, then after a few months she stopped again so i had to give up
its hard but there no point wasting cash on someone when the courts do fuck all but repeat what we already know BUT charge the father for it as hes the only one with a job
i would have tried to be nice but theres ALOT more to my story that i aint gonna go into too much apart from she said alot of lies about me and i fell for it like a prick to help PROVE her lies !!
hes best just seeing hes kids and doing local holidays,,,, camping and caravans are fun for kids,,,,, im gonna do one this year ( ok its a caravan in the south of france but thats just for the beach)
good luck
#43
think you will find he needs her permission to take them out of the country ... or as stated above its a case of reporting to the police he has run off with them ...
as for paying this is where the csa can come in handy .. if she is demanding more money go via the csa .. not alot she can do then ...
if she wont let him take them on holiday time to go and see a solicitor .. a nicely worded letter mentioning a court appearance might help her change her mind..
fathers do have a right to see and take their kids away on holiday .. and i would go through all legal means just to stick my fingers up and prove a point...
as for paying this is where the csa can come in handy .. if she is demanding more money go via the csa .. not alot she can do then ...
if she wont let him take them on holiday time to go and see a solicitor .. a nicely worded letter mentioning a court appearance might help her change her mind..
fathers do have a right to see and take their kids away on holiday .. and i would go through all legal means just to stick my fingers up and prove a point...
#45
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
mate i spend 7k trying to see my kid,,, she was a bitch about things and just like your mates ex
then she was ORDERED to let me see the kid,,,,, i was given half custody due to the court realising SHE WAS LYING,,,,,, then after a few months she stopped again so i had to give up
its hard but there no point wasting cash on someone when the courts do fuck all but repeat what we already know BUT charge the father for it as hes the only one with a job
i would have tried to be nice but theres ALOT more to my story that i aint gonna go into too much apart from she said alot of lies about me and i fell for it like a prick to help PROVE her lies !!
hes best just seeing hes kids and doing local holidays,,,, camping and caravans are fun for kids,,,,, im gonna do one this year ( ok its a caravan in the south of france but thats just for the beach)
good luck
then she was ORDERED to let me see the kid,,,,, i was given half custody due to the court realising SHE WAS LYING,,,,,, then after a few months she stopped again so i had to give up
its hard but there no point wasting cash on someone when the courts do fuck all but repeat what we already know BUT charge the father for it as hes the only one with a job
i would have tried to be nice but theres ALOT more to my story that i aint gonna go into too much apart from she said alot of lies about me and i fell for it like a prick to help PROVE her lies !!
hes best just seeing hes kids and doing local holidays,,,, camping and caravans are fun for kids,,,,, im gonna do one this year ( ok its a caravan in the south of france but thats just for the beach)
good luck
In this case though my friends parents moved to Portugal when they retired so this holiday is actually for all of them to go and visit them and stay with them, he normally takes them to North Wales with his sister too.
#46
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
think you will find he needs her permission to take them out of the country ... or as stated above its a case of reporting to the police he has run off with them ...
as for paying this is where the csa can come in handy .. if she is demanding more money go via the csa .. not alot she can do then ...
if she wont let him take them on holiday time to go and see a solicitor .. a nicely worded letter mentioning a court appearance might help her change her mind..
fathers do have a right to see and take their kids away on holiday .. and i would go through all legal means just to stick my fingers up and prove a point...
as for paying this is where the csa can come in handy .. if she is demanding more money go via the csa .. not alot she can do then ...
if she wont let him take them on holiday time to go and see a solicitor .. a nicely worded letter mentioning a court appearance might help her change her mind..
fathers do have a right to see and take their kids away on holiday .. and i would go through all legal means just to stick my fingers up and prove a point...
#47
I like the idea of the solicitors letter, no idea how she would respond to that though. She went away to speak to her solicitor about getting more money out of him but funnily enough the subject hasn't been mentioned since she saw the solictor. I reckon the solicitor told her she didn't have a chance and had it good.
#48
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
He's already used that and that is why he has dropped the payments. He can drop them further though like you say which is why she's one quiet I think after speaking to her solicitor.
#49
Caraholic
iTrader: (3)
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
#50
Fire with Fire
If it where me I would tell her if she doesnt hand over the passports then I won't be paying anything and I will buy the children what they need. I will also take legal action and you will have to get the csa involved whihc will take along time she will be without money.
If it where me I would tell her if she doesnt hand over the passports then I won't be paying anything and I will buy the children what they need. I will also take legal action and you will have to get the csa involved whihc will take along time she will be without money.
#51
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In that case, I think he should use this as leverage to ensure the holiday goes ahead. Basically he has to threaten to reduce the payments to HER to the minimum required by the CSA to ensure she coughs up the pass-ports. Tell her that he wants the passports next time he picks up the kids (to stop her from kyboshing the holiday at the last minute should she change her mind and refuse to hand over the passports) or the money goes down from that point on and won't go back up again, as she has had her chance.
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
#52
Super Moderator
iTrader: (5)
In that case, I think he should use this as leverage to ensure the holiday goes ahead. Basically he has to threaten to reduce the payments to HER to the minimum required by the CSA to ensure she coughs up the pass-ports. Tell her that he wants the passports next time he picks up the kids (to stop her from kyboshing the holiday at the last minute should she change her mind and refuse to hand over the passports) or the money goes down from that point on and won't go back up again, as she has had her chance.
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
#53
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
In that case, I think he should use this as leverage to ensure the holiday goes ahead. Basically he has to threaten to reduce the payments to HER to the minimum required by the CSA to ensure she coughs up the pass-ports. Tell her that he wants the passports next time he picks up the kids (to stop her from kyboshing the holiday at the last minute should she change her mind and refuse to hand over the passports) or the money goes down from that point on and won't go back up again, as she has had her chance.
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
He needs to play hardball with her, or she is going to continue to carry on and do the same. Obviously cutting the money paid to HER, does not prevent him from treating the kids to new clothes/gifts as and when he wants to, so I am not suggesting he penalise the children (which he won't do, as she sounds like she doesn't spend any of the money on them anyway).
Also, as the money is so important to her, he can use this to ensure that she NEVER steps out of line again, by saying that the second she gives him any grief or shit, the money is being reduced to the minimum amount required by the CSA. Show her the figures, so she knows what this would go down to if he wanted to play the same hardball game she is.....
Thanks everyone for your input so far
#55
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
He doesn't have a problem paying for them, it's the fact that she was spending the money on herself & not the kids He's not financing her lifestyle.
#56
Super Moderator
iTrader: (5)
What these type of mothers actually want is everything except you.
Mikes advice was excellent
Unlike probably most people posting on this thread I speak from experience,and if you are the father and have the kids the money issue with x's is no different they still want it all despite the fact the kids live with me.been there done that got the t shirt and the debts to prove it.
I can assure you it is a womens world
A famous quote from mark twaine " I don't mind living in a mans world as long as I can be a women in it "
Last edited by Turbosystems; 25-06-2008 at 01:55 PM.
#57
PassionFord Post Whore!!
Thread Starter
I know exactly what you are saying and she is very much like that. She also doesn't like the fact that he has a new partner and the kids like the new partner.
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